Wednesday, September 14, 2016

Sign language

"No one's gonna drag you up to get into the light where you belong
But where do you belong?"
I'm gutted.

Well, not really, but a little mad, a little hurt.

This has been the slowest week since I started selling beads on Facebook almost three years ago.

Usually when it's slow, something comes along to compensate. Beads of Courage asks to purchase some Carry-a- Bead pairs, or I sell a few beads or some frit blends on Etsy.

It's just been dead. I sold some glass, which is what I do when beads aren't selling, and sometimes when they are. The determining factor is whether I have enough boxes and packing peanuts and bubble wrap on hand.

Tonight my phone chirped with a Facebook message. Sometimes buyers message me to tell me they bid on or bought some of my beads. Not this time.

This was the message.
Your beads are pretty and fun, too.

But, I would prefer not to receive all the photos on Facebook. How can I no longer see them? Don't want to hurt your feelings, but there is just too much email coming in to my mail.

Keep well and continue to do beautiful beads. MaryAnn
I don't really know this person. She's never bought a bead from me. About a year ago, she posted that she wanted to sell a lampwork armrest. Our entire message history looked like this.
Me: I'm interested in your Creation Station.

She: Is there a way I can email you. I am in Arizona. where r u

Me: Texas. Lizbusa@yahoo.com

She: I will take photo and send details later. Thanks for your response. Mary Ann
She never sent photo or details.

Tonight I was tempted to respond, "feel free to unfriend me."

But I toned it down to this.
I have no idea how you have your notifications set up. You can unfriend me if you want to.
A couple of hours later I was curious enough to look. So far she hasn't.

Because I'm seeing signs everywhere lately, I wonder if it's time for a Facebook sales break. Whenever I've taken breaks in the past sales have picked up on my return.

They did that for a minute when I got home from the Poconos on September 1. Things petered out pretty fast though.

Our next trip isn't until late October.

I sent off a big box to Beads of Courage yesterday. I donated 150 beads. It crossed my mind that I'm trying to buy karma. Does that ever work?

In the box was a Dream Bead, a special request bead for a child in the program.

A little girl named Lillian asked for a purple, pink and blue owl. She even drew a picture. And gave instructions about colors.


I thought it came out cute.


I do what I can.

I'm still hooked on making lizards. After the first two sold in a flash, I haven't yet sold another. They are getting better though. Here are some of the latest lizards in the lounge.


I'm doing my best to avoid thinking about moving, since right now it causes acute anxiety. For example, how do we pack our clothes? Obviously not the way we did in past moves, grabbing things on hangars and stacking them in the back seat. What do I do with my bead collection? Tissue wrap every bead, bubble wrap them, pack them in plastic shoe boxes? I'm pretty sure I'll never unwrap them if I do. Like my collectibles in our last move. I just bought new ones.

But let's not go there. I'm diligently distracting myself by binge-watching multiple series. I just finished season four of Scott and Bailey and I'm about to wrap up The Kettering Incident. We just watched Edward Scissorhands (Neil had never seen it).

On Sunday we watched Churchill's Secret on Masterpiece Studio. His 1953 stroke is the secret, but the film is interesting for its portrayal of his family relationships and the fictional story of his nurse, Millie Appleyard. Millie is engaged to a young man and preparing to follow him to Australia as the story begins. Then, in a pivotal conversation with Churchill's wife Clementine, a women who has placed her husband's ambitions above all else, Millie voices doubts about the opportunities for her in Australia. She loves her work she says.
I’m sorry it’s ... It’s hard to explain, but the closer it gets to going, the more I think, I don’t know why I’m putting his dreams before mine.
Yes, signs everywhere. But only if you're looking.

No matter, I have nine months, maybe even a year to get my head wrapped around this move. I don't have to start packing yet.

And I expect in some ways it will be cathartic. I've said it before, I feel weighed down, in a psychic sense, by all the stuff in my life, in my house.

Poeple have written of the liberation they feel when they simplify their lives.

I've read about the KonMari method of decluttering from Marie Kondo's book The Life Changing Magic of Tidying: A Simple, Effective Way To Banish Clutter Forever.

Kondo recommends determing, object by object, if each item "sparks joy.
Do this by taking each item in your hand and asking yourself, does this spark joy?
My problem is that so far, most of my things spark joy. And if not joy, then guilt. As in, this was my grandmother's, this was my mother's, my kids gave this to me.

It's going to be a long, strange trip. And that's just the first step on this crazy journey.


Shock!

I got a new life
You would hardly recognize me I'm so glad
How could a person like me care for you
Why do I bother
When you're not the one for me
Oooo, is enough, enough

I saw the sign and it opened up my eyes I saw the sign
Life is demanding without understanding
I saw the sign and it opened up my eyes I saw the sign
No one's gonna drag you up to get into the light where you belong
But where do you belong?

Under the pale moon
For so many years I've wondered who you are
How can a person like you bring me joy
Under the pale moon
Where I see a lot of stars
Is enough, enough

I saw the sign and it opened up my eyes I saw the sign
Life is demanding without understanding
I saw the sign and it opened up my eyes I saw the sign
No one's gonna drag you up to get into the light where you belong
But where do you belong?"


(Jonas Berggren, Ace of Base)

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Thanks for your comment! I will post it as soon as I receive it. Liz